rained like hell last night

Man.., laying in my bed, wondering if my tin is fasend firmly, cause very thing is flapping,. wondering where on the house is that noise comming from?.
the yard looks pretty flooded too, .

I guess i can for see a change!
i'm going to go back an embrases my roots "the Davros complex",
On saturday, when i went by the gallery on my way out i was talking to the owener and some homless guy came up on a bike, the gallery owener knew the guy, and they chatted , apparently the homless guy was and artist and had some shows with this homless art organisation,. i asked him if he ever showed work to Yarddog, ( a local folk art outsider gallery) he said he hadn't heard of it, i told him "well they would love to look at your work they are interested in guys like you,"
"Wow" he explained,
"Man just take your work down there and show it to them, just walk right in the door, the gallery represents artists like this , and since people have already been buying your work they may have already heard about you.,
and you know if they turn you down ..
you know what you should do,. I would walk right in there with an axe handle and bash the frount desk in, and fuck the place up
whatta ya have to lose.
if the're majoring in outsider art, don't you think some of the artists would be a bit volital,...
and hell, you would be known. thats for sure after that, your life is the "stuff" this gallery wants to represent, fucking up this place would be doing them a favor, give them back their edge,"

you know come to think about it , in all my adventures of being on the "outsider zone" being a fucked up drunken loud mouth loser, is part of the outsider mastique , at least thats the way i can imagine it, After being out in Floyd, i realised that the outsider art market or folk art really only likes quiet, tame and introverted fuck ups,. i rember trying to convinces charlie that this was alright in the realm of mental illness ( he was a trained counciler had three mfa's) but he was unconvinced i was "fuck up"
I rember rolling around for nights on end trying to solve this controversy of a mystery, one's own intent vs whats real,? especialy when you have a peer group who says everything is fake.
I think the whole bad-slacker-outsider-punk thing is basicly the same to a degree. Could ones own self destrution be real or is it staged?... is there anything real to any of this.,.,, what is real? could you act yourself to the gave..
i guess the answer is yes, it doesn't matter what the reality of any circumstances is, if you don't reconise it doesn't exist, and the mind is a powerful machine. it doesn't matter what one does as much as what it means to oneself, any cries to measure who they are will typicaly fall on deaf ears, cause the meaning of any art making is interanly rewarded.
so yes you could act yourself to the grave, but who were you posturing?

one of my favorite antidotes from being out in Redford was once when Joey , this east coast artist came out to Redford to joint the art battle between me and Serg, he was made jealious by a "girlfriend" of ours Wendy, i never met the guy until he came out there, but thats how he knew of me, , he was a bit art snotty but was a talented painter, and wanted to discover his "soul" so to speek and ingage his imagination, well the point being is that, one of the charges brought from joey to us was
"who do you think you are?!" your not this!... or that...!."
yea, i agreed but look where we are at? ( your in the fucking desart!), , you mean you drove all the way out here to tell us off, are the tenticals of the art world so strong that they are gonna reach out into the smallest crack and holes of this country and to expose all the artists for making non-art,., why are you here, for that,? no one cares weather good or bad.. hey , the reason why we are here is to get away from that,.. hey i have an idea let pretent we have meaning, its fun its an experment, have you every had meaning, Do you know why you make things,. we are here to find out if we have meaning. is there a psychotic mogic to all this,."
Alot of the activiitys were in our studio,(private), but we did come out to chat.

I guess the meaning to all this is that , its good to pretent in art, but i remebr sergs saying he never pretents!
"hey lets throw ourselfs in a pool and try and drown ourselfs" you stupid jackass

Posted by chickengeorge at February 7, 2005 10:32 AM