trojan makings

this is the intior of the base of the Castle facade of Troy.,
humm
the history of paranioa,
as expressed there all these drama's
One thing i have learn by being here is what folks think of me and some of the antics /drama etc that get created about stuff, alot of it is just me but ,man i sure can go nutz with the stuff, my mind starts racing like listening to crazy matt talk about being bugged etc, you become convinced about what leads to what its all very female, what people say and actions that occure right out of view,
i must have alot of woman in me, to get all worked up over stuff, but also abusing drugs don't help either, being around my apt i spend alot of time by myself i have a tendency to dwell on things to much read to much into them, they take on live fighting causes, ,
I rember one time when i was in school over in SWT, a friend of mine made a painting, Ming, he made this painting of me being beet up by the art police, i thought it was an odd painting, why would he make such a painting, well, in retrospect he has heard me rant and rave over art click group conspiricy and who gets what were and why, its the maddingly insectual world of art and shows, , my simply paranoid mind can only fly off into some odd direction based on any slants or disagreements of stuff, ,.
Another problem i discovered i had was my jealiousy or , really the root of it, was my competive nature thrown on guys, especialy guys who get the girl and i fail at it,
Women act as a kinda judge and jury in this and as soon as its passed, you have this other guy , what do you do?
Its been odd exploring this this sumer , all this sleeping brings up these wierd memorys ,
When i was haning with curtis we talked about issues relationship stuff, and i told him i don't really have problems with women as much as i have probelms with unethical men, especially one who are on my side,.
it must be the vigliantte streek made in me when i was young fighting off these bullys, which is the root of the problem anyway,
really were my art started form the begining, art made to curce my bullys,
which was hate art, but really obsession , and the power of concentration siezed form it,.
I have always held women's desires/opinions/passion in high regard, but guys on the , other hand, might i be the lesser,
hummm
troubles arise..
friday13th style
Posted by chickengeorge at August 26, 2006 3:48 PM